My vegetable garden is growing! {now watch the crazy lady dance wildly with joy!} It’s a new “first” in my life. I have actually dug and planted a garden AND I haven’t killed anything! No blossoms, yet – so I have yet to figure out the intricacies of zucchini sex. My girlfriend had to “help” her zucchini plants achieve fertilization last year – I’m still not overly clear on the method. In-vitro for vegetables? Ah well…how difficult could it be?
I am attributing my current earth goddess success to my new morning ritual, which I began in early March. Every day around dawn I trek out back to the edge of our property and look out over the wheat field and watch the sun rise.
I stretch, then pause, then take three deliberate steps. The first step is into the moment – I notice the sights, sounds, smells and textures that surround me. The dampness of the dawn, the chilly breeze that raises goose pimples on my bare arms.
Next, I step into myself. I remind myself of my gifts, my strengths and my talents. I affirm that I am capable of turning around any situation, as long as my vision remains positive and strong. I remind myself how wonderful it is to be me – and I fortunate I am to greet another incredible day. I focus on abundance in my life; abundant love, abundant opportunities, abundant resources. I smile with the absolute knowledge that I am exactly where I need to be at this time in my life.
Finally, I step into the uncertainties that the day may bring. I again acknowledge that I can successfully handle anything that comes my way. I open myself up to the gift of surprise. I breathe in the new day.
I like my daily sun salutation - it empowers me for the day ahead. And let's be honest - we can all use some help during the day!
Enjoy!
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
Sunday, June 01, 2008
Gone to the Birds
Ah, spring! There’s nothing like taking that first cup of coffee outside into the dewy morn and reveling in the spirited songs of the birds, the low hoot of an owl, and the brightness of daffodils and tulips to make you long for….chickens!
Yup…it must be spring – I’ve got chickens on the brain – again!
Please note – I am NOT a country gal. I grew up in mainstream suburbia with the requisite dogs, cats, hamsters and occasional turtle or snake (THAT one didn’t stay for long!). But my dreams were filled with visions of horses and goats and alpacas and chickens.
About five years ago we moved from a bustling suburb of DC to a country town on MD’s Eastern Shore – with an entire 1/3 of an acre to call our own. We signed several papers regarding our – and our neighbors – “right to farm”. Wisely, with three children aged five and younger and two dogs, I suspected I had all the livestock I could handle!
But the days continue to pass. The children are older, and actually help out around the house. The two dogs have been joined by three cats (country – old house – mice!) and although we’ve seen snakes in and around our home – we haven’t named them! My middle child is as animal crazy as my younger self and dreams of horses and goats and chickens – and more horses!
I’ve been considering adding a small flock of laying hens to our backyard for several years now – but was told I was nuts. This year the husband and kids have agreed it’s a great idea AND I’ve found three other intellectually challenged womyn who have agreed to split an order of chickens with me! The minimum order from most hatcheries is 15-25 – and that sounds like a LOT of chicken poop! Four to six seems MUCH more doable.
But…there’s SO much to consider:
Breeds:
The tiny bantam breeds are adorable – and MUCH easier to handle. Many of the standard breeds are now available in the miniature version. However – the eggs are tinier, needing 3-4 eggs to replace 2 standard eggs AND they are only sold straight run (male & female mixed together). I really have no use for roosters. I want eggs, I’m not willing to cull the males to my freezer, and I’m pretty sure my neighbors wouldn’t be very excited about several crowing roosters. So…no bantams for now.
The choice of breeds for standard sized chickens is overwhelming. Do you want chocolate brown eggs? Go for the Maran, a breed developed in France in the mid 1800’s. Light blue or green eggs? You want the Araucana, a spirited, comical bird named from the Indian tribe of Chile where they were first discovered. The Speckled Sussex lays warm brown eggs and is known for being gentle with children (my daughter has named her still imaginary Sussex, Brownie).
The prolific layers are the Leghorn (remember the cartoon, Foghorn Leghorn?) for white eggs and Rhode Island Reds for brown eggs. Because they lay the most eggs, they are found in most of the commercial chicken houses. Many backyard poultry folks prefer to shelter the heritage breeds rather than the commercial choices.
I’m attempting to find the right combination of egg-laying ability and personality to stock my backyard flock. Many breeds are skittish or aggressive – and I want these critters to follow my kids around when given the opportunity!
This leads to Chicken Coop Design issues:
Forget the old stationary chicken coop with the tall fencing and the permanently bare ground! Today’s backyard farmers are all about the chicken tractor – a movable chicken coop and run. By relocating the run every few days (depending on the number of birds) your birds keep your lawn picked free of bugs and weeds, and add their nitrogen rich “compost” to your lawn! Best of all, your yard doesn’t get trampled into dirt! The designs for these chicken tractors are as varied as the chickens they contain. Larger farms may use an actual tractor to haul them around, but the backyard farmer usually can roll his smaller contraption without too much hassle. Most designs include an attached run which may be completely enclosed, totally protecting your birds from predators. A friend uses a movable electric fence around her small coop, which effectively keeps all land predators at bay, although her birds are still at risk to airborne attacks. (she doesn’t want to end up with a flock of geriatric non-laying pets, so the process of natural elimination works for her!)
Did you catch the part about chickens eating bugs? I’m really looking forward to that part, particularly mosquito-eating chickens! (wonder if that’s a separate breed???). I hate mosquitoes. Unfortunately – they LOVE me. I must taste like chicken.
And…if my future chickens do NOT eliminate the mosquito problem…
Apparently Native Americans would coat their bodies with bear grease – which would insulate them against harsh weather AND protect them from mosquitoes! I’m a little low on bear grease – but I have some Crisco in the back of a cabinet – and I’m NOT afraid to try it!
Namaste.
Yup…it must be spring – I’ve got chickens on the brain – again!
Please note – I am NOT a country gal. I grew up in mainstream suburbia with the requisite dogs, cats, hamsters and occasional turtle or snake (THAT one didn’t stay for long!). But my dreams were filled with visions of horses and goats and alpacas and chickens.
About five years ago we moved from a bustling suburb of DC to a country town on MD’s Eastern Shore – with an entire 1/3 of an acre to call our own. We signed several papers regarding our – and our neighbors – “right to farm”. Wisely, with three children aged five and younger and two dogs, I suspected I had all the livestock I could handle!
But the days continue to pass. The children are older, and actually help out around the house. The two dogs have been joined by three cats (country – old house – mice!) and although we’ve seen snakes in and around our home – we haven’t named them! My middle child is as animal crazy as my younger self and dreams of horses and goats and chickens – and more horses!
I’ve been considering adding a small flock of laying hens to our backyard for several years now – but was told I was nuts. This year the husband and kids have agreed it’s a great idea AND I’ve found three other intellectually challenged womyn who have agreed to split an order of chickens with me! The minimum order from most hatcheries is 15-25 – and that sounds like a LOT of chicken poop! Four to six seems MUCH more doable.
But…there’s SO much to consider:
Breeds:
The tiny bantam breeds are adorable – and MUCH easier to handle. Many of the standard breeds are now available in the miniature version. However – the eggs are tinier, needing 3-4 eggs to replace 2 standard eggs AND they are only sold straight run (male & female mixed together). I really have no use for roosters. I want eggs, I’m not willing to cull the males to my freezer, and I’m pretty sure my neighbors wouldn’t be very excited about several crowing roosters. So…no bantams for now.
The choice of breeds for standard sized chickens is overwhelming. Do you want chocolate brown eggs? Go for the Maran, a breed developed in France in the mid 1800’s. Light blue or green eggs? You want the Araucana, a spirited, comical bird named from the Indian tribe of Chile where they were first discovered. The Speckled Sussex lays warm brown eggs and is known for being gentle with children (my daughter has named her still imaginary Sussex, Brownie).
The prolific layers are the Leghorn (remember the cartoon, Foghorn Leghorn?) for white eggs and Rhode Island Reds for brown eggs. Because they lay the most eggs, they are found in most of the commercial chicken houses. Many backyard poultry folks prefer to shelter the heritage breeds rather than the commercial choices.
I’m attempting to find the right combination of egg-laying ability and personality to stock my backyard flock. Many breeds are skittish or aggressive – and I want these critters to follow my kids around when given the opportunity!
This leads to Chicken Coop Design issues:
Forget the old stationary chicken coop with the tall fencing and the permanently bare ground! Today’s backyard farmers are all about the chicken tractor – a movable chicken coop and run. By relocating the run every few days (depending on the number of birds) your birds keep your lawn picked free of bugs and weeds, and add their nitrogen rich “compost” to your lawn! Best of all, your yard doesn’t get trampled into dirt! The designs for these chicken tractors are as varied as the chickens they contain. Larger farms may use an actual tractor to haul them around, but the backyard farmer usually can roll his smaller contraption without too much hassle. Most designs include an attached run which may be completely enclosed, totally protecting your birds from predators. A friend uses a movable electric fence around her small coop, which effectively keeps all land predators at bay, although her birds are still at risk to airborne attacks. (she doesn’t want to end up with a flock of geriatric non-laying pets, so the process of natural elimination works for her!)
Did you catch the part about chickens eating bugs? I’m really looking forward to that part, particularly mosquito-eating chickens! (wonder if that’s a separate breed???). I hate mosquitoes. Unfortunately – they LOVE me. I must taste like chicken.
And…if my future chickens do NOT eliminate the mosquito problem…
Apparently Native Americans would coat their bodies with bear grease – which would insulate them against harsh weather AND protect them from mosquitoes! I’m a little low on bear grease – but I have some Crisco in the back of a cabinet – and I’m NOT afraid to try it!
Namaste.
Thursday, May 15, 2008
The Snake Whisperer
You know you’ve adapted to life in the country when you step off of your back porch and onto a small snake – and your heart continues to beat! In fact, after the initial gasp of surprise, you turn it into a learning experience and call the kids out to see – then carry the snake out to the field, in the hopes that the rye grass will protect the poor baby from predators!
Maybe it’s not the country life – maybe it’s me. I have a history with snakes.
It all began when I was ten – and a boy in our church brought me a small milk snake as a pet. At my mother’s urging, I carried the snake to my father to ask permission to keep it. Of course, my father was a minister and was in an Adboard meeting with a roomful of nicely dressed church folks. Who knew old people could run that fast???
In graduate school I rented a room from a girlfriend – a newly single mom. We lovingly referred to her suburban home as “Hell House” – and never was an abode more aptly named. For two years we shared such travesties as exterior doors that refused to open – simultaneously (try explaining THAT to your boss), electrical fires, deranged squirrels, cats in the walls, a raining lamp, flooded basement – and bombardier snake.
It started innocently enough. My friend and I were returning home after a strenuous day of bargain hunting; she went to the clothesline and I went to the back door. As I started to open the door, a shadow appeared above me. I ducked and screamed as a snake fell from overtop the door, caught itself on the metal railing - then raised its head and flicked its tongue at me!
To this day, my girlfriend swears I saved her life, “Because if the snake had fallen on ME – I’d have dropped dead from a heart attack!” She lived in the house another 10 years or so – and NEVER did either of us enter the house without first stepping back and looking up (and try explaining THAT to strangers!).
When we first moved to our home in the country we piled boxes of belongings in the front room until we had done necessary repairs. One day my four-year old daughter came through the front hall and started screaming – the bad kind of scream that makes your heart clench and your hand start dialing 911. I ran to her – and almost collided with a large black snake winding its way through my hallway. The snake – not liking the loud noise - was trying to hide by going under the door to the front room which we had filled with our boxes.
Now – my husband was terrified of snakes (he’s better now). I mean deep, unreasonable petrifying fear. I knew that if the snake got into the front room we would A) never find it and B) my husband would torch the house. Without thinking (and while screaming) I grabbed the snake by the tail and yanked it back from the door, dropping it when it turned to strike me. Several times this comedy of terror continued – with the snake getting more and more angry – until I was able to open the front door and swing the snake outside, where it disappeared under the house. I later found that a trap door in the closet floor was open, making easy access from below. Of course, once I realized how many mice find their way into a 1900’s country house I was wishing I had let the snake live indoors!
Snakes are my friends, now. We have an agreement. They don’t drop on me from above, and I respect their place in the universe. Last year I was somewhat dressed up for a 50th Anniversary party – hose, black high heels, black sheath dress, etc. As we started to pile in the car I noticed a large black snake by the front tire – possibly the same snake I had thrown from the house years before. I walked to the front porch and stood there, watching the snake and talking to it. The snake left the car and slithered right towards me, up on to the porch, then circling around my foot and going through my high heeled shoe! It paused – just for a moment – then disappeared through the porch boards under the house. My husband’s still mad he didn’t get a picture of it!
It was a wonderful moment – but not an incident I would have welcomed in my younger years. I am…slowly…but FINALLY…growing into the womyn I always meant to be!
Maybe it’s not the country life – maybe it’s me. I have a history with snakes.
It all began when I was ten – and a boy in our church brought me a small milk snake as a pet. At my mother’s urging, I carried the snake to my father to ask permission to keep it. Of course, my father was a minister and was in an Adboard meeting with a roomful of nicely dressed church folks. Who knew old people could run that fast???
In graduate school I rented a room from a girlfriend – a newly single mom. We lovingly referred to her suburban home as “Hell House” – and never was an abode more aptly named. For two years we shared such travesties as exterior doors that refused to open – simultaneously (try explaining THAT to your boss), electrical fires, deranged squirrels, cats in the walls, a raining lamp, flooded basement – and bombardier snake.
It started innocently enough. My friend and I were returning home after a strenuous day of bargain hunting; she went to the clothesline and I went to the back door. As I started to open the door, a shadow appeared above me. I ducked and screamed as a snake fell from overtop the door, caught itself on the metal railing - then raised its head and flicked its tongue at me!
To this day, my girlfriend swears I saved her life, “Because if the snake had fallen on ME – I’d have dropped dead from a heart attack!” She lived in the house another 10 years or so – and NEVER did either of us enter the house without first stepping back and looking up (and try explaining THAT to strangers!).
When we first moved to our home in the country we piled boxes of belongings in the front room until we had done necessary repairs. One day my four-year old daughter came through the front hall and started screaming – the bad kind of scream that makes your heart clench and your hand start dialing 911. I ran to her – and almost collided with a large black snake winding its way through my hallway. The snake – not liking the loud noise - was trying to hide by going under the door to the front room which we had filled with our boxes.
Now – my husband was terrified of snakes (he’s better now). I mean deep, unreasonable petrifying fear. I knew that if the snake got into the front room we would A) never find it and B) my husband would torch the house. Without thinking (and while screaming) I grabbed the snake by the tail and yanked it back from the door, dropping it when it turned to strike me. Several times this comedy of terror continued – with the snake getting more and more angry – until I was able to open the front door and swing the snake outside, where it disappeared under the house. I later found that a trap door in the closet floor was open, making easy access from below. Of course, once I realized how many mice find their way into a 1900’s country house I was wishing I had let the snake live indoors!
Snakes are my friends, now. We have an agreement. They don’t drop on me from above, and I respect their place in the universe. Last year I was somewhat dressed up for a 50th Anniversary party – hose, black high heels, black sheath dress, etc. As we started to pile in the car I noticed a large black snake by the front tire – possibly the same snake I had thrown from the house years before. I walked to the front porch and stood there, watching the snake and talking to it. The snake left the car and slithered right towards me, up on to the porch, then circling around my foot and going through my high heeled shoe! It paused – just for a moment – then disappeared through the porch boards under the house. My husband’s still mad he didn’t get a picture of it!
It was a wonderful moment – but not an incident I would have welcomed in my younger years. I am…slowly…but FINALLY…growing into the womyn I always meant to be!
Monday, April 07, 2008
Sniff??? It must be Spring!
I don't know if it's just my family - but it seems like someones been sick off and on since Christmas. Fevers, congestion, intestinal issues - we've tried them all! I'm really looking forward to opening up the house and airing it out when it gets warmer!
Of course, since we live in farm country, I must wait until all of the nasty, smelly disgusting chemicals and fertilizers are absorbed into the fields. Last week it was sunny and lovely, but we hid inside with everything closed because the air outside hurt our lungs. Some days it just stinks - but this one actually hurt. It scares me.
Just what are they putting on our foods and into our water supply? (I'm not glowing green yet, am I???) We were traveling down the road past many, many fields of various crops, when we came upon a large crop of rye grass - neon yellow. Now, for those city slickers among us, rye grass IS green - SHOULD be green. And really, neon is NEVER a good color in nature.
We're on the Eastern Shore, so everything goes into the Chesapeake Watershed. Scary, isn't it? Should I mention that the cancer rates around here are alarmingly high?
I'm sure it's just a coincidence, right? I mean - our government would NEVER allow us to be poisoned in the name of economics and money. Uh huh.
So...I'm determined to grow my own vegetable garden this year. Organic veggies, fresh from the ground - growing within 10 feet of a commercial crop with all the stinky stuff it can hold. Want to lay odds my veggies are as polluted as the neighboring field?
Hmmm...so much for simple purity of country living!
Enjoy!
Of course, since we live in farm country, I must wait until all of the nasty, smelly disgusting chemicals and fertilizers are absorbed into the fields. Last week it was sunny and lovely, but we hid inside with everything closed because the air outside hurt our lungs. Some days it just stinks - but this one actually hurt. It scares me.
Just what are they putting on our foods and into our water supply? (I'm not glowing green yet, am I???) We were traveling down the road past many, many fields of various crops, when we came upon a large crop of rye grass - neon yellow. Now, for those city slickers among us, rye grass IS green - SHOULD be green. And really, neon is NEVER a good color in nature.
We're on the Eastern Shore, so everything goes into the Chesapeake Watershed. Scary, isn't it? Should I mention that the cancer rates around here are alarmingly high?
I'm sure it's just a coincidence, right? I mean - our government would NEVER allow us to be poisoned in the name of economics and money. Uh huh.
So...I'm determined to grow my own vegetable garden this year. Organic veggies, fresh from the ground - growing within 10 feet of a commercial crop with all the stinky stuff it can hold. Want to lay odds my veggies are as polluted as the neighboring field?
Hmmm...so much for simple purity of country living!
Enjoy!
Monday, February 18, 2008
Have You Seen My Brain???
The aliens that live in my computer have absconded with my brain.
Really.
I have proof.
For the last 2+ days I've been sitting here mindlessly following links and reading blogs and filling out forms. It began Saturday, when I happened onto a blog, Thrifty Florida Mom, who talked about buying all kinds of groceries and drug store items for little or no money! Really!
Twenty-four hours later I have checked out about fifty different sites and stores and applied for several bonus cards. I've also printed about 20 pages worth of coupons. (and then went to Food Lion and got Eggo Waffles and 2 kinds of tissues for pennies!!)
Of course, then I needed a coupon organizer, and that necessitated about 10 more online stores, then another hour trying to make my own, then a trip to Roses to purchase said coupon holder for $2.00. Later today I plan to visit at least 2 different drugstores and another Food Lion (for more whole grain waffles).
Yup - I have issues.
It gets worse. This morning, following some link on a blog, I arrived at Slick Deals. There I followes ALL kinds of links and eventually started filling out forms to get free stuff (the USB bracelet should arrive shortly). Then - without any conscious thought - I began filling out survey forms to earn points towards Amazon gift cards.
Several hours later, after being caught in a never-ending form, I woke up.
OMG!!!
Shouldn't computers come with an UNDO button???
So.....to recap:
I now have 120 coupons with more arriving daily, many bonus cards, and 2.7 million emails, snail mail and probably phone calls from people who want me to buy their crappy goods. Does that about wrap it up???
I've spent the last two hours digging out the house, doing laundry, dishes and general de-cluttering. This is the FIRST I've written - in days.
Beating myself up now...
Really.
I have proof.
For the last 2+ days I've been sitting here mindlessly following links and reading blogs and filling out forms. It began Saturday, when I happened onto a blog, Thrifty Florida Mom, who talked about buying all kinds of groceries and drug store items for little or no money! Really!
Twenty-four hours later I have checked out about fifty different sites and stores and applied for several bonus cards. I've also printed about 20 pages worth of coupons. (and then went to Food Lion and got Eggo Waffles and 2 kinds of tissues for pennies!!)
Of course, then I needed a coupon organizer, and that necessitated about 10 more online stores, then another hour trying to make my own, then a trip to Roses to purchase said coupon holder for $2.00. Later today I plan to visit at least 2 different drugstores and another Food Lion (for more whole grain waffles).
Yup - I have issues.
It gets worse. This morning, following some link on a blog, I arrived at Slick Deals. There I followes ALL kinds of links and eventually started filling out forms to get free stuff (the USB bracelet should arrive shortly). Then - without any conscious thought - I began filling out survey forms to earn points towards Amazon gift cards.
Several hours later, after being caught in a never-ending form, I woke up.
OMG!!!
Shouldn't computers come with an UNDO button???
So.....to recap:
I now have 120 coupons with more arriving daily, many bonus cards, and 2.7 million emails, snail mail and probably phone calls from people who want me to buy their crappy goods. Does that about wrap it up???
I've spent the last two hours digging out the house, doing laundry, dishes and general de-cluttering. This is the FIRST I've written - in days.
Beating myself up now...
Monday, February 11, 2008
The Downside of Being a Grown-up
Actually, there are a LOT of downsides to being a grown-up. Not only must you take responsibility for yourself, your actions and your choices - you're usually responsible for other people, as well!
Let's see...five things I've been horrified to learn:
1. Animals are MUCH more fun when my mother is cleaning up after them.
2. Toilets are NOT self-cleaning.
3. Doing the best for your children usually requires delaying what's best for YOU!
4. Household bills - and grocery bills - increase at a terrifying rate.
5. Grown-ups are not supposed to wrap themselves in blankies and hide under the dining room table - at least not for long!
In case you hadn't figured it out - this will NOT be one of my hoo-rah inspiring entries. Why not, you ask?
1. It's Monday. [see older posts for THAT horror]
2. It's 10 degrees and windy - and that's inside!
3. I was at the Super Wal-Mart grocery shopping on Saturday AND Sunday - UGH!
4. I paid the bills. Now the goal is to spend NO money for the next two weeks.
5. I have no wine. :(
Pretty pathetic, isn't it? I have a hard time being productive when I'm cold. Now I DID manage to make tea and hominy (started THAT last night), homeschool three children, catch up with friends & family AND send out a writing proposal. I was feeling....ok. And then I paid bills.
Ignorance certainly IS bliss. (though it leads to stupid choices)
All right - enough is enough! Time to put on some good music & dance! Maybe have a special cup of Harney tea - and make a pot of potato-leek soup! And THEN wrap up in a blankie in my chair and read a book!
After all - tomorrow is another day! (with apologies to Margaret Mitchell)
Let's see...five things I've been horrified to learn:
1. Animals are MUCH more fun when my mother is cleaning up after them.
2. Toilets are NOT self-cleaning.
3. Doing the best for your children usually requires delaying what's best for YOU!
4. Household bills - and grocery bills - increase at a terrifying rate.
5. Grown-ups are not supposed to wrap themselves in blankies and hide under the dining room table - at least not for long!
In case you hadn't figured it out - this will NOT be one of my hoo-rah inspiring entries. Why not, you ask?
1. It's Monday. [see older posts for THAT horror]
2. It's 10 degrees and windy - and that's inside!
3. I was at the Super Wal-Mart grocery shopping on Saturday AND Sunday - UGH!
4. I paid the bills. Now the goal is to spend NO money for the next two weeks.
5. I have no wine. :(
Pretty pathetic, isn't it? I have a hard time being productive when I'm cold. Now I DID manage to make tea and hominy (started THAT last night), homeschool three children, catch up with friends & family AND send out a writing proposal. I was feeling....ok. And then I paid bills.
Ignorance certainly IS bliss. (though it leads to stupid choices)
All right - enough is enough! Time to put on some good music & dance! Maybe have a special cup of Harney tea - and make a pot of potato-leek soup! And THEN wrap up in a blankie in my chair and read a book!
After all - tomorrow is another day! (with apologies to Margaret Mitchell)
Thursday, February 07, 2008
If it's Thursday it must be Barley...
In honor of the new year - and hoping to save a few bucks - I've been endeavoring to cook healthier foods. Whole grains - bought in bulk - and sometimes simmered overnight. In the past couple of days I've made some awesome grits - did you know they DON'T have to be the watery wallpaper paste you get in restaurants??? Who knew? Cooked with milk and water - I add salt with garlic, cheddar cheese and parmesean cheese - and they ROCK!!! This time 2/3 kids actually liked them (after complaining for 30 minutes). The one who didn't like them is the one who likes everything else!!!! Go figure.
I've also - quite frequently - taken some cracked 9-grain blend & cooked it - then stirred in wheat germ and crushed flax seed. Then I serve it with plain yogurt (from the Amish market), honey and dried cranberries. Delicious! At least to me.
Tonight's dinner is almost vegetarian chili (I had a wee bit of sausage in the fridge)and cornbread.
My husband's not sure he's going to survive this - he really prefers cheeseburgers. Did I mention I put barley in the chili? I'm hoping my husband doesn't notice. I've been cooking with barley a lot. Everyone still hates it. They'll eventually get used to the flavors - right???
I guess only time will tell.
Speaking of time - my baby has his first loose tooth - he's very excited. He's six and a half - so he's past due. Do other six year old's swing back and forth between being absolutely delighful and so outright defiant you want to mail them to Mexico??? Or am I just lucky???
I've also - quite frequently - taken some cracked 9-grain blend & cooked it - then stirred in wheat germ and crushed flax seed. Then I serve it with plain yogurt (from the Amish market), honey and dried cranberries. Delicious! At least to me.
Tonight's dinner is almost vegetarian chili (I had a wee bit of sausage in the fridge)and cornbread.
My husband's not sure he's going to survive this - he really prefers cheeseburgers. Did I mention I put barley in the chili? I'm hoping my husband doesn't notice. I've been cooking with barley a lot. Everyone still hates it. They'll eventually get used to the flavors - right???
I guess only time will tell.
Speaking of time - my baby has his first loose tooth - he's very excited. He's six and a half - so he's past due. Do other six year old's swing back and forth between being absolutely delighful and so outright defiant you want to mail them to Mexico??? Or am I just lucky???
Saturday, February 02, 2008
Dancing Womyn
January has been an amazing month for me - I'm finally reconnecting to the Universe and finding my place and my voice. I'm working on unleasing my creativity - and sharing the results with the world.
I've made a door quilt to help insulate our living room, a quilt square for a friend's mother's blessingway, and many delicious, healthy meals {note: children may disagree with the last statement}.
Even better, I'm writing - a LOT. I have a regular post on Donne Tempo, an online womyn's magazine; I'm writing a tween's fiction novel - and researching the Civil War on the Eastern Shore for the book; AND....I wrote a song. Yup - ME! Actually, I used to write songs, but never really did anything with them. This time I'm lining up musicians and seeking options. I'll eventually record it to share with you!
Oh, AND...the picture of the dancing womyn? I DREW that!!! (and I don't draw!!!) My wonderful husband took the picture of the moon in our backyard, and superimposed the dancing womyn on it. The words are from my song - it sounds better put to music!
One month down - many to go. Isn't life a wonderful journey?
Namaste.
Monday, January 07, 2008
Happy New Year!
I'm back! {huff, puff, whew!} And I ran the entire way!
Well, ok, maybe not. But I DID get through the holidays without losing sanity, friends, children or my temper! Of course, everyone immediately became ill as soon as Christmas was over. I'm thinking all the yummy baking I did wasn't that helpful to our immune systems.
The good news...it's WARM today! That 1900 house I call home is NOT cold weather friendly. Not to mention, the electric company annoyed me - and I now refuse to give them any more of our money than absolutely necessary! Except for the bathrooms - we're heating the house with the woodstove. Even when it hit 10 degrees F. (I did buy long underwear - to wear in the living room) It's funny, the cold doesn't bother the kids at all - they'll go around with bare feet!!! (can you say, "insane"???) Me, my feet arrive a good two minutes before the rest of me, I have on so many socks! Our rat terrier, Jadzia, is worse than I am. She starts giving me "the LOOK" at soon as it drops below 70. You know, the face that says, "If you really loved me, we'd move to California!!!"
At any rate - it's now 2008! Here's to finding ourselves and our strengths, and creating our best life!
Namaste!
Well, ok, maybe not. But I DID get through the holidays without losing sanity, friends, children or my temper! Of course, everyone immediately became ill as soon as Christmas was over. I'm thinking all the yummy baking I did wasn't that helpful to our immune systems.
The good news...it's WARM today! That 1900 house I call home is NOT cold weather friendly. Not to mention, the electric company annoyed me - and I now refuse to give them any more of our money than absolutely necessary! Except for the bathrooms - we're heating the house with the woodstove. Even when it hit 10 degrees F. (I did buy long underwear - to wear in the living room) It's funny, the cold doesn't bother the kids at all - they'll go around with bare feet!!! (can you say, "insane"???) Me, my feet arrive a good two minutes before the rest of me, I have on so many socks! Our rat terrier, Jadzia, is worse than I am. She starts giving me "the LOOK" at soon as it drops below 70. You know, the face that says, "If you really loved me, we'd move to California!!!"
At any rate - it's now 2008! Here's to finding ourselves and our strengths, and creating our best life!
Namaste!
Saturday, November 03, 2007
The Joys of Parenthood
Ah, parenthood.
Peanut butter kisses, warm hugs, snuggling on the couch with your 6 year old son, who's not yet too old to cuddle his mommy. And then he starts talking...
Gabe: "I love you mommy....SO MUCH!"
Me: "I love you, too!"
Gabe: "But I love Taryn more because when I'm a man and she's a woman we're going to get married. We're going to live in a palace and have five kids and five dogs and four cats and a bunny!
Me: "Aren't you a little young to be getting married?"
Gabe: "Not now! When we're grown up! You'll be old by then, almost dead. Yup, you'll be dead by then."
Ah....parenthood.
Nuff said???
Peanut butter kisses, warm hugs, snuggling on the couch with your 6 year old son, who's not yet too old to cuddle his mommy. And then he starts talking...
Gabe: "I love you mommy....SO MUCH!"
Me: "I love you, too!"
Gabe: "But I love Taryn more because when I'm a man and she's a woman we're going to get married. We're going to live in a palace and have five kids and five dogs and four cats and a bunny!
Me: "Aren't you a little young to be getting married?"
Gabe: "Not now! When we're grown up! You'll be old by then, almost dead. Yup, you'll be dead by then."
Ah....parenthood.
Nuff said???
Monday, October 29, 2007
Going with your strengths...
I have always referred to myself as "multi-talented". For one thing - it sounds MUCH more positive than "lazy-assed slug". I DO have talents - even if they don't include team sports or keeping house like Martha Stewart. My talents are harder to explain - at least to my mother!
I read, I write, I communicate, I speak. (Note that washing the windows didn't make that list) I actually love public speaking - I really enjoy that form of communication. To me, it's sharing my writing - verbally! I discovered public speaking in 6th grade (and won best in school for my version of "America's Promise"). My dad was a Methodist minister, so I also had the opportunity to be the guest lecturer at different Methodist churches before I was out of college. Later on I traveled around the country, talking about the different research projects I worked on as a PhD student. Once I was in private practice (audiology) I would travel to different groups and talk about hearing loss. I also became a certified toastmaster - just for the fun of it!
People had told me for years that I should follow in my father's footsteps and become a minister - but I had a few problems with that. For one - mainstream religion doesn't fit me well - I believe everyone must find their own path. I eventually became a Unitarian Universalist - and found a few more public speaking opportunities there! But - even in a UU church - I have no desire to be a minister. I've lived that life - and have no desire to repeat it. But parts of it appeal to me.
Last month by dear friend Theresa decided to re-marry. They were having a hard time finding a pastor that would design a ceremony to reflect their beliefs and journey. Theresa said she really wanted ME to design and perform the ceremony - so I did. I became a certified wedding officiant and quickly put together a simple wedding ceremony that included Theresa's children and the different backgrounds and beliefs of Theresa and her husband to be.
It was amazing. The ceremony took place in the courtyard of a small restaurant - with about 20 friends and family members. The ceremony was unique, touching, and memorable. One of my favorite parts was the exchanging of rings...
The wedding ring is a circle symbolizing the sun, and the earth, and the
universe. It is a symbol of wholeness, perfection and peace.
As you enter into the circle of your shared love,may you be blessed through
your devotion to this union. May your journey as husband and wife be filled
with peace, love and joy.
Then the ring vows were exchanged...
This ring is my gift to you.
May it always remind you
that from this day forward, you will be surrounded by my love.
It felt right, performing the wedding. I felt so blessed to be able to contribute my puny talents to their celebration. Let's face it - other friends took care of flowers, make-up, restaurant reservations and so on. Instead of being the usual "bump on a log" I was able to make the day incredibly special for them.
I read, I write, I speak, I communicate.
Not bad talents, really. I plan on using them MUCH more frequently.
Namaste.
I read, I write, I communicate, I speak. (Note that washing the windows didn't make that list) I actually love public speaking - I really enjoy that form of communication. To me, it's sharing my writing - verbally! I discovered public speaking in 6th grade (and won best in school for my version of "America's Promise"). My dad was a Methodist minister, so I also had the opportunity to be the guest lecturer at different Methodist churches before I was out of college. Later on I traveled around the country, talking about the different research projects I worked on as a PhD student. Once I was in private practice (audiology) I would travel to different groups and talk about hearing loss. I also became a certified toastmaster - just for the fun of it!
People had told me for years that I should follow in my father's footsteps and become a minister - but I had a few problems with that. For one - mainstream religion doesn't fit me well - I believe everyone must find their own path. I eventually became a Unitarian Universalist - and found a few more public speaking opportunities there! But - even in a UU church - I have no desire to be a minister. I've lived that life - and have no desire to repeat it. But parts of it appeal to me.
Last month by dear friend Theresa decided to re-marry. They were having a hard time finding a pastor that would design a ceremony to reflect their beliefs and journey. Theresa said she really wanted ME to design and perform the ceremony - so I did. I became a certified wedding officiant and quickly put together a simple wedding ceremony that included Theresa's children and the different backgrounds and beliefs of Theresa and her husband to be.
It was amazing. The ceremony took place in the courtyard of a small restaurant - with about 20 friends and family members. The ceremony was unique, touching, and memorable. One of my favorite parts was the exchanging of rings...
The wedding ring is a circle symbolizing the sun, and the earth, and the
universe. It is a symbol of wholeness, perfection and peace.
As you enter into the circle of your shared love,may you be blessed through
your devotion to this union. May your journey as husband and wife be filled
with peace, love and joy.
Then the ring vows were exchanged...
This ring is my gift to you.
May it always remind you
that from this day forward, you will be surrounded by my love.
It felt right, performing the wedding. I felt so blessed to be able to contribute my puny talents to their celebration. Let's face it - other friends took care of flowers, make-up, restaurant reservations and so on. Instead of being the usual "bump on a log" I was able to make the day incredibly special for them.
I read, I write, I speak, I communicate.
Not bad talents, really. I plan on using them MUCH more frequently.
Namaste.
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
The Joy of Old Houses
I've always loved old houses. The style, the history, the personality - the new housed just can't compete. When we bought our 1900 house I was ecstatic - sure, it needed work, but nothing we couldn't handle.
Go forward 4.5 years. The house still looks like early ghetto. We DO have hot water and a kitchen, thankfully. The husband is making a strong attempt to finish the walls in the main rooms so I can paint them - and I've actually chosen paint! I had to empty and move all the bookcases so he could GET to the walls, though. He was in spackling last week, then called me. He directed my attention down to an abandoned, coverless outlet that had been behind the bookcases. The back half of a mouse was hanging out of the wall, tail dangling.
Can you say, "YUCK! YUCK! GROSS!!!"? Cause I did. Or possibly I said more than that - I don't really remember. I had been smelling something "unusual" for the past month, a girlfriend had been telling me the animals probably dragged a potato somewhere, and it was decomposing. Well - it was decomp - but no potato.
Now...how long until I can walk into the dining room without wrinkling my nose???
And....it's almost time to cut the field behind us - which means we will once more be inundated with the lovely mice. We DO have three cats - time for earn their kibble!
Ah...lovely Victorian houses. Is there anything better?
Don't ask.
Go forward 4.5 years. The house still looks like early ghetto. We DO have hot water and a kitchen, thankfully. The husband is making a strong attempt to finish the walls in the main rooms so I can paint them - and I've actually chosen paint! I had to empty and move all the bookcases so he could GET to the walls, though. He was in spackling last week, then called me. He directed my attention down to an abandoned, coverless outlet that had been behind the bookcases. The back half of a mouse was hanging out of the wall, tail dangling.
Can you say, "YUCK! YUCK! GROSS!!!"? Cause I did. Or possibly I said more than that - I don't really remember. I had been smelling something "unusual" for the past month, a girlfriend had been telling me the animals probably dragged a potato somewhere, and it was decomposing. Well - it was decomp - but no potato.
Now...how long until I can walk into the dining room without wrinkling my nose???
And....it's almost time to cut the field behind us - which means we will once more be inundated with the lovely mice. We DO have three cats - time for earn their kibble!
Ah...lovely Victorian houses. Is there anything better?
Don't ask.
Friday, August 31, 2007
Aaaaarrrrrrggggghhhhh!!!!!
It's September - how did that happen???? Next week starts chorale, dance & co-op, soon to be follow by karate, speech, book clubs & the YMCA. Oh yeah - and our formal education resumes on Monday! Also in September we have two trips to the Science center, a Sultana trip, and possibly a zoo visit.
And somewhere in there - I need to work!
Did I mention.....AAARRRRRGHHHH???
Please send positive energy, followed by LOTS of coffee, followed by alcohol.
Yeah, that might help!
ruck rucka rucka
And somewhere in there - I need to work!
Did I mention.....AAARRRRRGHHHH???
Please send positive energy, followed by LOTS of coffee, followed by alcohol.
Yeah, that might help!
ruck rucka rucka
Sunday, August 19, 2007
Homeschooling 101
Went to Jungle Jims today, a water park in Rehobeth Beach, DE. (yeah, it was overcast and raining, in case you were wondering). The kids had a ball!
I was talking with a lovely woman there, sharing kid tales. She asked what school my children attended, and I told her we homeschool. Her mouth dropped open and she asked, in complete awe, "How do you manage?"
I looked that delightful woman straight in the eye and replied......
"I drink."
yeah....it's been THAT kind of week. Oh well - at least I made a new friend! (when she stopped laughing, anyway!)
I was talking with a lovely woman there, sharing kid tales. She asked what school my children attended, and I told her we homeschool. Her mouth dropped open and she asked, in complete awe, "How do you manage?"
I looked that delightful woman straight in the eye and replied......
"I drink."
yeah....it's been THAT kind of week. Oh well - at least I made a new friend! (when she stopped laughing, anyway!)
Monday, August 13, 2007
FYI
Just in case you ever REALLY need some scotch tape to hang a note on the door for DHL, but your lovely children have absconded with every roll of tape you own....
Just stick that printed, professional note to the clean glass door with blue modeling clay. Then wash your hands - a few times. The blue stains.
Off to wash the door...and buy more scotch tape.
Just stick that printed, professional note to the clean glass door with blue modeling clay. Then wash your hands - a few times. The blue stains.
Off to wash the door...and buy more scotch tape.
Tuesday, August 07, 2007
Camping for Couch Potatoes!
For those of you who would rather read a good book than leave the house - take note! We, the famous (infamous?) Bubble Family, survived AND enjoyed our first camping trip!
The tent, newly purchased for the event, was a tad disappointing. Really rotten assembling instructions, and when we finally figured it out we realized it was MUCH smaller than we expected. Two of my kids ended up happily sleeping in the attached (but floorless) screen room, so all was well.
I was so proud of myself when I called my husband that evening. "We got the tent set up - by ourselves, I built a fire AND I just cooked hot dogs and salmon over the fire. Let's face it - I ROCK!!!"
We went swimming the next day and had a fantastic time - until my 5 year old disappeared. Again. He has this thing.....if he doesn't see me he picks a direction and BOLTS as fast as he can. Luckily this time he was wearing a lime green floatie. I ran to the life guard - who already had him corraled - all the way at the other end of the beach. Did I mention he runs - fast???
Rucka rucka rucka...
The tent, newly purchased for the event, was a tad disappointing. Really rotten assembling instructions, and when we finally figured it out we realized it was MUCH smaller than we expected. Two of my kids ended up happily sleeping in the attached (but floorless) screen room, so all was well.
I was so proud of myself when I called my husband that evening. "We got the tent set up - by ourselves, I built a fire AND I just cooked hot dogs and salmon over the fire. Let's face it - I ROCK!!!"
We went swimming the next day and had a fantastic time - until my 5 year old disappeared. Again. He has this thing.....if he doesn't see me he picks a direction and BOLTS as fast as he can. Luckily this time he was wearing a lime green floatie. I ran to the life guard - who already had him corraled - all the way at the other end of the beach. Did I mention he runs - fast???
Rucka rucka rucka...
Thursday, August 02, 2007
The Secret...Revealed!
I have discovered the secret to awesome family adventures!!! In the last three days we have 1) Gone on our FIRST family camping trip and 2)Spent the day at Six-Flags America - all with my friend T and her two children.
The secret? Simply this... lower your standards. Drastically.
My goal was survival. I expected to be miserable - but hey, it was for the kids. The only thing I wanted to do was avoid catastrophes. I met my goal!
I'll detail the camping trip in the next post, right now I'll focus on the Six-Flag Adventure:
We were going to Six Flags for one reason, and one reason only....our children read the required eight hours (each) to earn a FREE ticket - and they refused to be denied their prize!
I started out excited about the upcoming adventure - and then I started researching the place. Reviews were horrible: the place was crowded and dirty, the lines were long and service was slow - and that was the good news! As we looked into "additional" charges we realized our "Free" day was going to cost a mint. $15 parking, $7.00 pretzels, $14.00 hamburgers, $9.00 raft fee. I started to fret and fume, and try to figure out less expensive options. I eventually gave up.
We postponed the trip several times, eventually settling on last Sunday. You know - the day of the monsoons? Luckily, we bailed before getting into the car, and rescheduled for yesterday. It meant T couldn't bring her boyfriend, but at least it was a Wednesday, and hopefully less crowded.
We were already tired from camping, and slow to get on the road. We didn't get to Six Flags until almost noon, and decided to stop and fuel up on the cheap at McDonald's before entering the EXPENSIVE ZONE. Paid the $15 for parking (rucka rucka rip-off!) and started schlepping to the gates. Finally got inside and realized we had to pay $17 for a locker rental (guess we didn't need to collect those quarters, after all!!!!)
And then - we were ready to play! Despite many buses filled with children, there was no wait for the non-thrill rides. Each ride, however, still took forever. The people seemed to move in slow motion, there was a deliberate pause before each movement and safety check, then they always stopped for the two extra people that were "almost" there, then did the safety checks again. I think it was a company policy, actually. They lose money the more times they run the ride, and so try to fill each ride to capacity before they start - and they are in NO hurry to start. Ah well.
It was a memorable event on the wooden roller coaster - the children and my husband's FIRST time on a large coaster - and my LAST. Stick a fork in me, I'm done!
When we were done with the ride part, we shared water and snacks we had stashed in the locker, then changed into swimsuits. Our first water ride was everyone's favorite - riding an inner tube down 1 of 4 slides into a 3foot deep pool. What fun! We spent quite a bit of time on that one before moving on.
The rest of the water park was less impressive - although the kids had a ball! I was especially impressed by the diligence of the lifeguards - they were amazing! (ok, I was initially irritated by their penchant for incessant whistle blowing - but I moved on!) Turns out the life guards are constantly tested and monitored. I saw one guy being berated because it took him over 30 seconds to see (and retrieve) the object the tester had thrown into the pool. Another dove into the water, blowing her whistle frantically, to "rescue" a staged drowning victim. No wonder these folks look like their wired on speed! I have NEVER seem a place take life guarding so seriously - way to go, Six Flags!!!
By now the kids were dragging and hungry. We bribed them into waiting until we left the park to get dinner by promising them dessert, as well (no, we have no shame, we're PARENTS!). We ended up at a nearby Ruby Tuesday's. The five children sat at one booth and the three adults were able to eat and speak in relative peace and another table! AND...the waitress kept telling us what wonderful, polite children we had!!!! (guess exhaustion works - right up til the moment they dissolve into a quivering mass, anyway)
We then took ours to the bookstore for a treat. They each got a book, and read in the car until they fell asleep. We were home and in bed by 10.
It was a good day! Wasn't perfect, but we were expecting to have such a hideous time that it seemed wonderful by comparison!!!
So there you go folks....when all else fails - lower your standards!
Pop back soon for the camping adventures of the bubble family - complete with real horror stories!!!
Enjoy!v
The secret? Simply this... lower your standards. Drastically.
My goal was survival. I expected to be miserable - but hey, it was for the kids. The only thing I wanted to do was avoid catastrophes. I met my goal!
I'll detail the camping trip in the next post, right now I'll focus on the Six-Flag Adventure:
We were going to Six Flags for one reason, and one reason only....our children read the required eight hours (each) to earn a FREE ticket - and they refused to be denied their prize!
I started out excited about the upcoming adventure - and then I started researching the place. Reviews were horrible: the place was crowded and dirty, the lines were long and service was slow - and that was the good news! As we looked into "additional" charges we realized our "Free" day was going to cost a mint. $15 parking, $7.00 pretzels, $14.00 hamburgers, $9.00 raft fee. I started to fret and fume, and try to figure out less expensive options. I eventually gave up.
We postponed the trip several times, eventually settling on last Sunday. You know - the day of the monsoons? Luckily, we bailed before getting into the car, and rescheduled for yesterday. It meant T couldn't bring her boyfriend, but at least it was a Wednesday, and hopefully less crowded.
We were already tired from camping, and slow to get on the road. We didn't get to Six Flags until almost noon, and decided to stop and fuel up on the cheap at McDonald's before entering the EXPENSIVE ZONE. Paid the $15 for parking (rucka rucka rip-off!) and started schlepping to the gates. Finally got inside and realized we had to pay $17 for a locker rental (guess we didn't need to collect those quarters, after all!!!!)
And then - we were ready to play! Despite many buses filled with children, there was no wait for the non-thrill rides. Each ride, however, still took forever. The people seemed to move in slow motion, there was a deliberate pause before each movement and safety check, then they always stopped for the two extra people that were "almost" there, then did the safety checks again. I think it was a company policy, actually. They lose money the more times they run the ride, and so try to fill each ride to capacity before they start - and they are in NO hurry to start. Ah well.
It was a memorable event on the wooden roller coaster - the children and my husband's FIRST time on a large coaster - and my LAST. Stick a fork in me, I'm done!
When we were done with the ride part, we shared water and snacks we had stashed in the locker, then changed into swimsuits. Our first water ride was everyone's favorite - riding an inner tube down 1 of 4 slides into a 3foot deep pool. What fun! We spent quite a bit of time on that one before moving on.
The rest of the water park was less impressive - although the kids had a ball! I was especially impressed by the diligence of the lifeguards - they were amazing! (ok, I was initially irritated by their penchant for incessant whistle blowing - but I moved on!) Turns out the life guards are constantly tested and monitored. I saw one guy being berated because it took him over 30 seconds to see (and retrieve) the object the tester had thrown into the pool. Another dove into the water, blowing her whistle frantically, to "rescue" a staged drowning victim. No wonder these folks look like their wired on speed! I have NEVER seem a place take life guarding so seriously - way to go, Six Flags!!!
By now the kids were dragging and hungry. We bribed them into waiting until we left the park to get dinner by promising them dessert, as well (no, we have no shame, we're PARENTS!). We ended up at a nearby Ruby Tuesday's. The five children sat at one booth and the three adults were able to eat and speak in relative peace and another table! AND...the waitress kept telling us what wonderful, polite children we had!!!! (guess exhaustion works - right up til the moment they dissolve into a quivering mass, anyway)
We then took ours to the bookstore for a treat. They each got a book, and read in the car until they fell asleep. We were home and in bed by 10.
It was a good day! Wasn't perfect, but we were expecting to have such a hideous time that it seemed wonderful by comparison!!!
So there you go folks....when all else fails - lower your standards!
Pop back soon for the camping adventures of the bubble family - complete with real horror stories!!!
Enjoy!v
Friday, July 27, 2007
Small breasted women of the world - take heart!
I was always tall and thin. Used to hear the jokes, growing up....."Turn her sideways and she disappears" and "What sticks out further, her nose or her chest???"
Yup. Funny stuff. Really. The comedic talent of those around me never ceased to amaze.
And....I rather liked my chest! They were small (b-cup) but perky! Let's face it - they had personality!
And then I birthed, and nursed, three children. The youngest nursed til he was three. His favorite trick was to latch on, plant his feet on my belly and catapult himself over my shoulder. Without letting go.
I knew things had "changed" chestwise. Perky was certainly a thing of the past. But "womanly" was ok, too. I searched for bras that hiked my now non-perky friends up to a more acceptable position. I even sought out the help of an older woman at the Penney's store for fitting advice. I eventually threw out my 34B's and accepted my post-baby 40C's.
But I hated buying - and wearing the bras that fit now. They were old lady hassocks, ugly and frumpy. When I tried a prettier bra - nothing fit. Body parts stuck out at weird angles, or lounged down on my belly as if in defeat. Not to mention, trying on bras while juggling THREE small children is a sanity tester by itself!
Last Sunday I went shopping with a girl friend - sans the six children who usually accompany us. I once more struggled to find a less hideous bra. I drug my friend into the act who immediately announced I was wearing the wrong size. [Apparently Oprah did a show recently - Bless that woman!]
Yesterday I left the children with Grandma long enough to be fit at Nordstroms. Here's to Sasha, the certified fitter (it says so right on her business card) who settled me into a large dressing room, did her magic with the measuring tape, and then spent the next hour bringing me bras for my approval. I entered in a frumpy, old-lady bra measuring 38C and left in a blue lacy number in the size.....ready? 34DDD! Triple D! Me - the chestless one! [now, some stores refer to that as 34E - but that makes me think of E for Elephants - so I MUCH prefer the DDD!]
I am woman, watch me strut!
I called my husband with the news..."The good news, honey, is that your wife is STACKED!....The bad news...it's almost impossible to find a bra in 34DDD for less than $50!" He seemed to consider it a fair trade. Bless his little male heart.
The funny part.....I still don't look like I have large breasts. In fact, the new bras are "minimizing" -so I actually looked bigger before. But my button down shirts fit better!
I'm thinking these bras were designed by women and I need to find one (just ONE!) that was designed by a man! "Well....HELLO! How lovely to meet all THREE of you!"
In the meantime - I'm walking tall! (and ma, check out my posture!)
Yup. Funny stuff. Really. The comedic talent of those around me never ceased to amaze.
And....I rather liked my chest! They were small (b-cup) but perky! Let's face it - they had personality!
And then I birthed, and nursed, three children. The youngest nursed til he was three. His favorite trick was to latch on, plant his feet on my belly and catapult himself over my shoulder. Without letting go.
I knew things had "changed" chestwise. Perky was certainly a thing of the past. But "womanly" was ok, too. I searched for bras that hiked my now non-perky friends up to a more acceptable position. I even sought out the help of an older woman at the Penney's store for fitting advice. I eventually threw out my 34B's and accepted my post-baby 40C's.
But I hated buying - and wearing the bras that fit now. They were old lady hassocks, ugly and frumpy. When I tried a prettier bra - nothing fit. Body parts stuck out at weird angles, or lounged down on my belly as if in defeat. Not to mention, trying on bras while juggling THREE small children is a sanity tester by itself!
Last Sunday I went shopping with a girl friend - sans the six children who usually accompany us. I once more struggled to find a less hideous bra. I drug my friend into the act who immediately announced I was wearing the wrong size. [Apparently Oprah did a show recently - Bless that woman!]
Yesterday I left the children with Grandma long enough to be fit at Nordstroms. Here's to Sasha, the certified fitter (it says so right on her business card) who settled me into a large dressing room, did her magic with the measuring tape, and then spent the next hour bringing me bras for my approval. I entered in a frumpy, old-lady bra measuring 38C and left in a blue lacy number in the size.....ready? 34DDD! Triple D! Me - the chestless one! [now, some stores refer to that as 34E - but that makes me think of E for Elephants - so I MUCH prefer the DDD!]
I am woman, watch me strut!
I called my husband with the news..."The good news, honey, is that your wife is STACKED!....The bad news...it's almost impossible to find a bra in 34DDD for less than $50!" He seemed to consider it a fair trade. Bless his little male heart.
The funny part.....I still don't look like I have large breasts. In fact, the new bras are "minimizing" -so I actually looked bigger before. But my button down shirts fit better!
I'm thinking these bras were designed by women and I need to find one (just ONE!) that was designed by a man! "Well....HELLO! How lovely to meet all THREE of you!"
In the meantime - I'm walking tall! (and ma, check out my posture!)
Monday, July 23, 2007
A Sense of History
I hear children screaming. It must be Monday.
We're taking a break from formal learning right now - so apparently the children just scream because it's Monday - not because they don't want their new Latin vobabulary words. Good to know.
Actually, I have only two children screaming. The eldest is spending a few days with Grandma. She's riding her bike to the beach, going swimming, and making friends with the children of MY old playmates! I like the sense of continuity.
It's funny - I've always been one for moving on - new places, new challenges. The Beach house has been my only constant in life. And, as it turns out, that's important to me. Who knew?
Here's to enjoying life's simple pleasures, my friends!
We're taking a break from formal learning right now - so apparently the children just scream because it's Monday - not because they don't want their new Latin vobabulary words. Good to know.
Actually, I have only two children screaming. The eldest is spending a few days with Grandma. She's riding her bike to the beach, going swimming, and making friends with the children of MY old playmates! I like the sense of continuity.
It's funny - I've always been one for moving on - new places, new challenges. The Beach house has been my only constant in life. And, as it turns out, that's important to me. Who knew?
Here's to enjoying life's simple pleasures, my friends!
Monday, July 16, 2007
The Universe - 9,371: Me - 0
Sometimes my life feels like an "I Love Lucy" show. You know, where whatever CAN go wrong - WILL!
Case in point: I have been endeavoring to improve my image. When we moved to the country I was thrilled that I could roll out of bed and trundle off to the local stores in whatever was handy & comfortable and STILL be considered presentable.
And then you clean the mirror and realize that YOU have become the frumpy hag you never wanted to be! Hence, the makeover.
I've become zealous about using my fantastic Tarrah skin-care line (I'm also a distributor - but haven't done anything with it - yet!) so that my face is smooth, soft, and glowing. I've also used the Tarrah foot care system - but need to do it again! I'm dressing well upon waking, AND doing hair and makeup. That's it - I want to be the womyn who can handle anything - and STILL keep her lipstick on straight. If only I could stop eating it off. {{sigh}}
All this sounds good - right? Enter the laughing Universe.
Ever since my new approach - "things" are happening. I'm looking polished and professional as I herd my children into a local store. I happen to glance down and realize that my 5 year old - the one who reads fluently AND is learning Latin - has apparently FORGOTTEN how to use a toilet - and simply doesn't care!! He actually had several "potty issues" that week - all of them involving me dealing with them in heels and lipstick.
And then there was the bank incident. I can't even blame this one on the kids - I was alone. The bank moved their ATM - it's now in the wall of the drive-thru. The first time I used it I hadn't gotten close enough to the wall, and could barely reach the thing. Now I was determined to correct that mistake -and pulled in quite closely. I was making a deposit, and the machine asks if you want an envelope (they no longer have them just sitting there - the machine will give you ONE).
Unfortunately, I fumbled the envelope, and it fell outside the car. And I can't get the door of the car open far enough to get out. So....I'm leaning, stretching (most likely also cursing) and finally repositioning myself so that my leg (I'm 5'11") can pull the envelope close enough that I can stretch down and pick it up. Meanwhile the ATM is beeping at me - but not offering any more envelopes OR giving me back my bankcard. All of this - on film. I'm so proud. Oh well, at least my lipstick was on straight!
The Universe has a whacky sense of humor - and doesn't want us to take ourselves too seriously, apparently.
Luckily, laughing at myself has always been easy. Too easy. {{sigh}}
Enjoy!
Case in point: I have been endeavoring to improve my image. When we moved to the country I was thrilled that I could roll out of bed and trundle off to the local stores in whatever was handy & comfortable and STILL be considered presentable.
And then you clean the mirror and realize that YOU have become the frumpy hag you never wanted to be! Hence, the makeover.
I've become zealous about using my fantastic Tarrah skin-care line (I'm also a distributor - but haven't done anything with it - yet!) so that my face is smooth, soft, and glowing. I've also used the Tarrah foot care system - but need to do it again! I'm dressing well upon waking, AND doing hair and makeup. That's it - I want to be the womyn who can handle anything - and STILL keep her lipstick on straight. If only I could stop eating it off. {{sigh}}
All this sounds good - right? Enter the laughing Universe.
Ever since my new approach - "things" are happening. I'm looking polished and professional as I herd my children into a local store. I happen to glance down and realize that my 5 year old - the one who reads fluently AND is learning Latin - has apparently FORGOTTEN how to use a toilet - and simply doesn't care!! He actually had several "potty issues" that week - all of them involving me dealing with them in heels and lipstick.
And then there was the bank incident. I can't even blame this one on the kids - I was alone. The bank moved their ATM - it's now in the wall of the drive-thru. The first time I used it I hadn't gotten close enough to the wall, and could barely reach the thing. Now I was determined to correct that mistake -and pulled in quite closely. I was making a deposit, and the machine asks if you want an envelope (they no longer have them just sitting there - the machine will give you ONE).
Unfortunately, I fumbled the envelope, and it fell outside the car. And I can't get the door of the car open far enough to get out. So....I'm leaning, stretching (most likely also cursing) and finally repositioning myself so that my leg (I'm 5'11") can pull the envelope close enough that I can stretch down and pick it up. Meanwhile the ATM is beeping at me - but not offering any more envelopes OR giving me back my bankcard. All of this - on film. I'm so proud. Oh well, at least my lipstick was on straight!
The Universe has a whacky sense of humor - and doesn't want us to take ourselves too seriously, apparently.
Luckily, laughing at myself has always been easy. Too easy. {{sigh}}
Enjoy!
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